Logomachon






Clearing the Fog
in the
War of Words

 

   
  logomachy--1. A dispute about words. 2. A dispute carried on in words only; a battle of words.
logomachon--1. One who argues about words. 2. A word warrior.

   
   
   
 

2004-09-26
 

Flip-flop John from Armentières


What does John F. Kerry’s middle initial stand for? Flip-flop? François? Why be consistent? Let’s use both in a song.

A discussion on the American Dialect Society listserv of Mademoiselle from Amentières gave me the idea. Flip-flop John from Armentières! Think of the possibilities. For instance:
Flip-flop John from Armentières, parlez vous
Flip-flop John from Armentières, parlez vous
Flip-flop John from Armentières,
He ain’t been right in 30 years.
Hinky-dinky, parlez vous.
Of course you can do better. After a few more minutes thought, I did better:
Jean François in Vietnam, parlez vous
Jean François in Vietnam, parlez vous
He bumped his head, he scratched his ass
And said "I‘ll give this war a pass".
Hinky-dinky, parlez vous.

John came back from Vietnam, parlez vous.
John came back from Vietnam, parlez vous.
John came back from Vietnam,
A purple Band-aid on his arm.
Hinky-dinky, parlez vous.
So how about a contest of Hinky-dinky verses about John "Band of Mongols" Kerry? You don’t have to limit yourself to military and Vietnam references. Any part of his campaign position, his life, his career will do. Oh yeah, there is that 30-odd year dead spot in his career between the VVAW and the Democratic primary. Well, work around it.

Don't send your entries here. This blog isn't big enough. Send them to James Tarranto at the WSJ’s Opinion Journal. He’ll thank you.

Here are a few more:
Flip-flop John from Armentières, parlez vous.
Flip-flop John from Armentières, parlez vous.
When Dubya said “Clean out Iraq!”
John said, “First check with Jacques Chirac”.
Hinky-dinky, parlez vous.

Kerry kissed the Viet Cong, parlez vous.
Kerry kissed the Viet Cong, parlez vous.
He always sang the Commies’ song . . .
He’ll say we done Osama wrong.
Hinky-dinky, parlez vous.

Jean François has proved his guts, parlez vous.
Jean François has proved his guts, parlez vous.
All Dubya did was fly some jets,
But John pissed off the Swift Boat Vets.
Hinky-dinky, parlez vous.
Just remember, "WMD" doesn't scan:
Jean François and Jacque Chirac, parlez vous.
Jean François and Jacque Chirac, parlez vous.
Jean talked tough on Double-U Em Dees,
Until he caught the French disease.
Hinky-dinky, parlez vous.



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